Twitter and grammar, things that make me vomit edition

I have a personal policy, that involves eschewing e-contact with all people who use text speak, can't spell, and abuse emoticons (you get one per conversation. This is a strict rule that is enforced with real-life slaps once we finally meet up). That said, I choose to avoid the bad spellers (Firefox has built in spell check. Use it, please), the terrible grammarians, and emoticon abusers. I don't seek them out or, God forbid, try to fix their mistakes, like these Twitter grammar jerks.

And yes, I realize that someone who has a blog dedicated to commenting and occasionally judging stuff (who, me?) is throwing rocks from a glass house, but seriously, this is like going to visit the monkeys at the zoo and complaining when they throw shit. It's what monkeys do. Sure, there are some non-shit flinging monkeys, and some grammatically correct Twitter-ers, but not many.

Plus, seriously, it's like bailing out the Titanic with a thimble. Smoochy was wrong: you can't change the world, and you also can't make a dent.


  1. Really? Wow. That seems like a helluva good use of your time.

    Do they make any allowances for people with really big fingers using a Blackberry?

    I love to snicker at other people's bad grammer, too. Hey, what's not to like when someone proves that you are, in fact, smarter than they are. And just after I finish my self-congratulatory (but private) party in my head, I'll notice that I used the word to when I meant also.

  2. Those "Twitter grammar jerks" would have field day in my house. Although I'm slightly anal about grammar and spelling (don't even get me started on my irritation with you're and your), I've learned to relax because not even stern disapproval will convince my 13-year-old stepdaughter that the boy in her class is *sexy* not sexxi.

  3. I always check my e-correspondence to make sure I've only used one emoticon per letter. Sometimes I'll catch myself ending all my sentence with :)'s.

    When I go back and think about it, it's like saying, "I'm smiling here!" after everything I say.

    Don't forget to take out the trash! (I'm smiling here)

    Last time I was out of town you forgot and the garage smelled like ass funk. (I'm smiling here)

    Also, call your mom--it's her birthday and if you forget, then she'll curl up in a little ball like last time. (I'm smiling here.)

    I miss you! (I'm frowning here.)

  4. I love to snicker at other people's bad grammer, too.

    It's spelled "grammar."

  5. Deadly Accurate: It's also called "humor." Sorry, there's no font for airquotes.

  6. See, this is why grammar patrol isn't all it's cracked up to be.

    And Jamie--I have to check myself for exclamation points! Or I am constantly exclaiming!!

  7. I have been enjoying reading "The Lexicographer's Dilemma". The story and history of the rules of English is very entertaining.

    Laura, my favorite "grammar nazi" (I say that with tongue in cheek...oh, if there was only a symbol I could have used rather than bore you with this run on sentence), you have a problem with the grammar and spelling on Twitter? Just wait until the e-book allows everyone to self-publish their own books. More than one twitter account has made the big time. Think of the future and all those books written with the freedom that only the English language can offer.