Things about Twilight I could have kept from you

I have, in the past, been a bearer of Twilight related bad news for society. I have sworn that, one day, I will be a force for good, instead of evil, but it just keeps being easier to bring the bad Twilight news to the fore. So, continuing my trend: did you know that Twilight related baby names have shot through the roof? There's going to be a whole generation of boys named Cullen dating girls named Bella, causing their parents to squee to no end.

And, although the boys won't sparkle, there are coping methods for non-sparkle boyfriends. ...Are these all signs of the apocalypse, or just me getting a headache?

The zombies are tweeting, hide your brains

Well, technically, the zombies are being tweeted about. Manvszombies is a Twitter feed that chronicles the zombie apocalypse. Two of my favorites thus far are:

Sometimes when I'm bored I look out the window and imagine a fireball whizzing down the block. I think that actually just happened.

and:

Even the zombies are getting into it. They seem to be BBQing. I could have sworn one muttered, "Oooh, the boob meat is tender."

I almost wish zombie novels and Twitters were not so amazing, because I cannot stop reading them and they routinely scare the crap out of me, and then all  of a sudden it is 4am and I am planning my zombie escape plan (it is very, very detailed. Spots on my survival team are still open). I read somewhere around 100 books a year, and World War Z is the only one I routinely recommend to people.

And so, as someone who is 100% objective, all of the time, I can safely say: zombies are awesome.

I am out of Twitter jokes

Rick Moody is tweeting a short story, with snippets every ten minutes until Wednesday (except for sleepy time). That is a lot of effort, and a lot of tweeting (which I don't do, because I can't schedule it the night before and then be pleasantly surprised when it magically pops up during the day. Pop!). Whatever, Doonesbury made fun of it, and Doonesbury is never wrong.

But, the coolest part? If you want, you can get the whole short story in a book of tweets! I know, I know, I'm great and I do things for you all the time. It must be true that human nature is helpful.